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I know what you’re thinking, when you think ‘content creator’ automatically your mind goes to YouTube and yes I am a ‘YouTuber’ I just like using the term ‘content creator’ because it makes me feel all fancy. Aside from that, I do have twitter, facebook, instagram etc, sometimes there are so many sites I use I often forget.

So yeah, basically I put myelf out there on the internet for the people of the world to see and judge me for it. ‘Talk about being shameless right?’

But, putting youself out there is never really easy or being yourself ‘geuine’ as most people say, in front of the camera without thinking of all the negative things people would think about you after watching you. Back before I even started YouTube I was quite a fragile person, very timid, shy and was so awkward around meeting new people let alone introducting yourself to them. I had a very strong passion for music and loved being able to sing and rap, but needed a way to gain exposure for it and what better site to use than ‘YouTube’. I origanially thought of YouTube as a place to put videos and just gain exposure from it, but once I did get ‘exposure’ it was then that I had gotten the first time I had gotten ‘hate comments’.

The comments became toxic to me and effected me in more ways then one, and while I pretended everything was okay, it wasn’t, the comments would always playback in my head like a broken record and it tore me up inside. It then reached a point, where I wanted to delete all the videos and erase myself from the world of YouTube for good.

Just as I was about to it was then I had come across Dan Howell aka danisnotonfire and a little later Phil Lester aka Amazingphil on YouTube. When I watched them for the first time it was so inspiring, how they did what they loved without any regard how others may view them. As Dan had stated once he put ‘his shame out there’ for the world to see and didn’t care anymore. I loved how they could always turn something negative to positive. They saved me from all the negative feelings I was being a victim of, it was also at this point I saw YouTube as a community, a place full of so many amazing people that I couldn’t even begin to imagine.

They inspired me to start doing YouTube not as someone who simply uses it to gain exposure, but make videos I love and not worry what others may say to me. I started making vlogs, and then have progressed adding more elements to my channel such as dance, reviews, spoken word etc. It is thanks to them, I can always remain positive and have fun being who I am and doing what I love.

Dan and Phil, are my heroes and will always be so, I hope that someday I can meet them and let them know how much they mean to me.

I hope you enjoyed the read and you get an insight more into well me. Please let me know in the comments, if you ever experienced something similar or if you’re a content creator like, yes got that ‘fancy’ word in again. I’d love to hear about you, see you next time.

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